In to the liquor store I go And knock upon its door. I want something that makes me drunk And doesn’t make me poor. The cashier said “You’d best not stay, I need your age before you pay. Some ID now, you ugly bore, Come back when you look 34!” My aim was to get drunk tonight I have to change my plans Wood alcohol is cheap, alright I’ll buy a couple of cans (at Statoil!) Cleared the shelves of methanol This is in line with my end goal Now this dilemma faces me: The more I drink, the less I see!